home of loving support for bereaved parents

I'm angry at God and no longer want to go to church. How could God let this happen, and am I evil for being angry at Him?

From Marilyn Heavilin . . .

The answer to this question depends a lot on your prior relationship with God. I have discovered that even those who claim to be atheists are mad at God when a child dies. Prior to the deaths of three of my children, I had a deep and seemingly close relationship with God. However, I had to come to grips with the fact that I had a "comfortable" concept of God. I had in my mind that "bad things don't happen to good people." I have hunted and hunted for that verse in the Bible, but I haven't found it yet!

As an active Christian, I determined to get to know the God of scripture. After reading through the Bible more than 38 times, I have come to believe that Christians are not exempt from "bad" things. God never promised we wouldn't have trouble; He simply promised He would be there in the midst of the trouble. That promise has proven true in my life. Rather than blaming God for your pain, I would encourage you to go to the roots of your belief and check it out. Don't just believe what others tell you you should believe. Your friends are seldom well-versed in their own beliefs and can give you very confusing and misinformed answers.

You are not evil for feeling anger toward God. Read the Psalms. King David was often very frustrated with God's ways and he told Him so, but he and God remained good friends in spite of David's anger.

Much love,
Marilyn Heavilin
Author of Roses in December